Tool Trays & Tool Belts

Have you ever marveled at the finesse with which a dental assistant passes to the dentist the next tool they need? The assistant holds the tool in the air, the dentist reaches out (sometimes back behind where he can see) and without looking, knows it's going to be there at the precise moment he (or she) needs it. I've seen the same thing with a carpenter who works alone but reaches into a precisely place belt of tools that he pulls from without hunting or hesitating even for a moment. If I could have half this much efficiency when even hanging a picture on my wall, it would be a proud day indeed. But in my office, with the work that I do, I do have a favorite calculator, a favorite thumb dri

WHO AM I

Hello. My name is Macy Rae -- and I was depressed. What are you? Hello. My name is Macy Rae -- and I was alone . What are you? Hello. My name is Macy Rae -- and I was trapped . what are you? Hello. My name is Macy Rae and I was a cutter. What are you? Hello. My name is Macy Rae -- and I was-- ??? Have you ever noticed the way a story can define you? My story did. I wore it as though it were an outfit. My depression kept me warm and safe. My anxiety was "comfortable". My self harm made me happy. When I looked at myself in the mirror, I somehow became my scars. Macy Rae faded away and became a crimson drip on white porcelain. It was as though I never existed outside of my wounds.

Thirteen reasons why, is not a reason why.

Recently people have begun to ask me if I based my Project off of the popular TV series, and novel, Thirteen Reasons Why (despite the fact that I only heard of the show a few weeks ago). I would like to say that I disagree with the messages of 13 Reasons Why. Don't get me wrong, I watched 13 Reasons Why. I thought the acting was good, I thought the plot was engaging. I believed the producers depicted mental health well... There was even a piece of me that could understand Hannah's mind as I was once suicidal. Still 13 Reasons Why and Project Reasons, are two drastically different worlds, entirely separate of each other. 13 Reasons Why deals with suicide on a different level. In each

Bent, not broken

Springtime in the Rockies brings heavy, dense snow that blankets the ground and trees, burdening the smallest pine trees with a weight they can hardly bear. When the snow hits, I often look out the window and assess how my little pines are doing. Mostly I look and see that they are going to be okay, but on some occasions, I see that the snow is simply too heavy and I go and relieve my little trees of just enough of that snow, that they will emerge victorious after the storm passes. Sometimes the tree will long bear the marks of its time in the storm: It is bent, short a branch that it had before, it looks tired, and needs some reprieve from the elements until it gets its strength back. I hav

Un(Ashamed)

-For all the lovely women- Have you ever done something so humiliating, so awful that you believe you will never be able to face the world again? The mistake of accidentally waving back to someone who was waving at someone else entirely. We've all done it. If you claim you haven't--well first of all, I do not believe you--but for those of us who have done this, it is absolutely humiliating. There is no going back. The mistake has been made and worse still, you and this stranger still have to walk past each-other in the next moment. In the split second you make eye contact and decide all over again that you would like to disappear into a hole. The worst part of this situation is that it appe

illusions

Watch the Fab 4 (Beatles impressionists) perform and you will surely be momentarily lost in the illusion that it is 1964 while you watch a young Paul McCartney perform "Yesterday". Surely a harmless and fun illusion for an evening. I'm a fan! The Fab4 doesn't hold a candle to the illusions we create and consume daily on social media. Keep reading! I know you don't want to read it, but truly, are we not addicted to creating a very specific image of who we want to be seen as? Tempted to forgo enjoying the moment in favor of capturing that perfect photo, not for a photo album or picture frame, but for that Instagram post, not for this week, since we already have one planned (for posting on the

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